Don't be discouraged

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There are definitely moments (could be many), when we have to deal with rejection in life. 


Two nights ago, whilst having dinner, I shouldn't have but I suddenly found myself checking my inbox messages. I did it as if I knew something was waiting for me.


"OK, like I have predicted, I got rejected," I told my husband.


"What? Who?" of course he would ask.


"The shop I tried doing consignment with, they rejected my application," I said, handing the phone to my husband, but decided to read out loud these lines: "...your collection does not currently meet the criteria we are using to diversify and expand our current selection of designers."


"Idiot," my husband said.


When I sent out my application, I had a very strong feeling that I would be rejected. But  I told myself, no harm trying, they don't know me, I don't know them, there wouldn't be any embarrassment.


My elder daughter was busying with her network socialising, but I noticed my little one was suddenly nervous.


"Mommy...Can you tell me what happened? Who doesn't like your stuff?" she asked, worriedly.


"No, that's us adults talking, dear," my husband tried to ask her to concentrate on her dinner and finish it.


But I thought differently. I told her, very simply, a shop did not find interests in my work and they would not be selling my designs online.


I also thought it was a very good opportunity to let the young girls know when you grow up and work, you get expectations, you get appreciation, and you get rejection too. You must never think you are the best. 


I said everything very calmly, and I was a bit angry my elder one, a teenager, found that Facebook was so much more important than Mommy getting rejected. I tried to control my temper.


When I looked back at my plate of food, I could tell I had already lost my appetite. Regardless of how composed I looked. I seldom had leftover, but I allowed myself to waste the last mouthful of rice and two little pieces of curry porkchop. 


The rejection was not at all an embarrassment, but definitely a disappointment.


I was lying to everyone.


No, I didn't feel alright.


Who was I lying to? My temper finally erupted yesterday. I got mad at teeny tiny things at home. 


Every now and then I go back to my temple for meditation. 


One time the temple master told me, "Without the past, without the present. You have to be thankful to your past. Those experiences are what make you here today."


I always try to believe in his words. 


My husband and my younger one asked me to delete the email right away.


"No! I won't!" 


I wanted to keep it, the email serves as one of those teachers you have at school, those we call them "a living terror", without them, you won't progress. And when you don't progress, you will never excel. 


Ever since I started working on my own again, there's no one to teach or be my mentor. I need opinions (regardless objective or subjective) on my work. I need to know how I can do better, what mistakes I can avoid.


I only immediately deleted their junk mail and unsubscribed their service. I just can't believe they rejected me but readily put me on their mass marketing mailing list!? I won't buy anything from them! 


It did reply with a funny automatic message asking if this email from them had been forwarded to a friend who had accidentally clicked "unsubscribe". Funny, really, they did think of that!


I confirmed my unsubscription by clicking the button. 


>:-]


Revenge taken.


How silly I would look back, perhaps next week, to laugh at myself.


Only two days, I am already feeling grateful. 


There are many happenings in life. Rejection is just one of them. Whether it is related to work or personal relationship, to be rejected is a way to learn to be accepted, in the future. 


At least this is what I think.